• Dr. Markesha Miller

How to Practice Self-Love

Updated: Oct 21

Self-love is the best love. Releasing negative thoughts and negative criticisms will make it easier to embrace YOU. Our thoughts create our actions and reality, therefore operating from a space of self-love can change your life.


Self-love is not only in the way we talk to ourselves, but can also be displayed in tangible ways. It is incredibly important to practice self-love in order to prevent burnout and promote peace.


This list was created to inspire you to start prioritizing self-love.


Start your day by saying something positive. There is always something to celebrate and there is always something going right. Give yourself friendly reminders, and practice more compassion towards yourself and towards others.


Eat healthy. You are what you eat is not just a cliche, food is your fuel, your immunity and your energy. You could also try a brand new recipe, or take yourself out to a nice dinner. Nonetheless do not skip meals, and treat yourself occasionally.


Find a way to move your body. Moving your body is caring for your body. Taking care of your body is a great act of self-care, and moving your body can also help you healthily express yourself. If aerobic exercise isn't your thing, turn your music up and dance around your living room like no one is watching.


No comparison, no judgment. Comparison fuels the inner critic, and judgment will leave you feeling bad about yourself. Embrace your differences, they make you unique. There is no one like you, you are amazing just as you are.


Step into the present moment and calm your mind daily. Observe your breath, observe your feet resting on the earth, observe five yellow items in your surroundings. What do you taste? What do you smell? What do you hear? Doing one thing at a time is also a great way to arrive in the present moment. There is something particularly special about enjoying a cup of coffee or tea, taking a phone free walk, or washing the dishes by hand. Next time you wash the dishes, feel the water and soap on your hands while standing up tall instead of leaning on the counter.


Practice gratitude. Gratitude is not just writing a list of what you are thankful for, but it is also showing gratitude. Tell someone why you are thankful for them, or do something nice for a stranger without expectation of anything in return. Treating people kindly and treating people with respect can fill your cup and lift your spirit.


You do not have to do it by yourself. Reach out to the people who wholeheartedly care for you. Knowing that you are loved makes self-love much easier. In addition to surrounding yourself with people who care, it is important to let go of toxic relationships. Toxic relationships will steal your joy and hold you back from reaching your highest potential. Ending a toxic relationship or decluttering your friendships will leave you feeling free and help you to see more opportunity in life.


Say no. Over commitment leads to feelings of exhaustion and resentment. Your time is valuable and there is no sense in over committing and creating unnecessary stress in your life. You do not need anyone else’s approval. Saying no is you right, and can help others begin to respect and value your time.


Take time to journal. Journaling is a great way to clear your mind and manage your emotions. Do a brain dump. Take what’s in your mind and put it down on paper. Before you open your journal, set the intention to let go of what you write down. Use the pages of your journal to expressively reflect, carefully problem solve, and review patterns in your life.


What is your happy place? Perhaps your bedroom is your sanctuary, maybe a hot bath feels nurturing? Maybe you have a favorite park bench. No matter the place, you can always close your eyes and imagine what it looks like, what it smells like, and what it feels like.


Get dressed. Wear your favorite outfit. You do not have to wait for a special occasion to wear your favorite outfit, put it on, and wear it with confidence. Feeling confident in your outfit can improve your attitude.


Say nice things to yourself. I am enough. I have the right to be here. I have the right to take up space, I am worthy of love. I am good at the things I do. I am unstoppable.


Now, take some time and prioritize you.


© 2020 by Markesha Miller, Ph.D.